Here we go again

Dear Friends and Family -

If you reading this then you know that I was recently diagnosed with breast cancer. I am calling this blog "war on cancer" as I believe strongly that I have declared war on cancer and we will once again beat this disease. I say once again, because as most of you know this is my second war (WWII) on cancer. For those of you that dont know, I had stage IV Hodgkin's Lymphoma in 2001 and had 6 months of chemotherapy treatment and was cancer free and chemo free as of March 8, 2002 (an anniversary Todd and I still celebrate to this day).

On Monday, November 2nd, 2009 I went in for my first mammogram. As I approach the age of 40 (yikes) the doc felt it was time to get my first mammogram. We had no reason to think it would be anything but "routine". While the docs that treated me for Hodgkins disease said that my risk for contracting other cancers was now higher due to the chemotherapy, I have to admit breast cancer was not on my radar screen. It's not like we have a history of it in our family. Anyway, the following day after my mammogram, I received a call to come back for some additional mammograms, an ultrasound and possibly a biopsy. This was scheduled for a week and a half later. After a conversation with my doctor, it didnt seem as if I had to much to worry about. She explained that since it was my first mammo, there was no benchmark to go off of, so they were going to be very thorough and be sure that they understood everything and get a closer look.

I went in on November 12th for the additional tests. After 6 more mammo pics and an ultrasound, the radiologist came in to explain he still wanted to go ahead with biopsies of 3 areas. At that point it all seemed very familiar. I forced the doctor to tell me what was going on. After explaining this was not my first time with "The Cancer" (as my dear friend Kat calls it), the doc gave in and said "I would be surprised if it was NOT cancer."

So, I had 3 biopsies (upper right, lower right and a lymph node in the right) done an hour or so later. Can I just say "OUCH".

On Friday, November 13th (I just realized that was Friday the 13th), the docs called to officially say I have cancer. It was confirmed in 2 out of the 3 biopsies. (Upper and lymph).

As I write this, its been over a week and we are adjusting. If there is one thing that I learned last time around it is that we need to take control of this situation and not let the situation control us. So, we moved quickly, scheduled some additional tests, got tons of recommendations for oncologists (as my current oncologist that has been monitoring me for hodgkin's is a blood related cancer specialist, so this is out of his area of expertise), and scheduled appointments with 2 different oncologists. All of this will occur this week. By end of day Wednesday, we should have an idea of the course of treatment, the timeline and hopefully choose the best team of doctors to treat me.

I started this blog for 2 reasons: 1) to share our progress as we go into battle and then conquer this disease and 2) because so many of you have asked what can I do. In regards to the second reason, I have been wanting to write an article (and shop it around to magazines) entitled "My friend has been diagnosed with cancer, and I dont know what to do...." Well looks like I should stop putting it off and get writing.

Here's my initial thoughts/notes for what I call "rules of engagement" with someone that has cancer. While not all individuals fighting cancer may agree with me, I can tell you this is what I would recommend and what I need in my world:

Rules of Engagement
1) Positive attitudes only (enough said)
2) Don't ask "what if...." and "why me/why you". I've come to the conclusion there really are no good answers for that one.
3) It's o.k. to ask me how I am doing. No need to ask those around me, its o.k. to ask me directly. I'll tell ya!
4) Allow us to, what I call, "cocoon" once in a while. We will need time to adjust as a family at times. There is no way to know if advance if we are cocooning so its o.k. to call, we might just not answer the phone for a bit.
5) I get sick of talking about doctors and test results so its o.k. to tell me about your day and whats going on in your life. It's not all about me...though I may think it is. te he he.
6) Normalcy is key. It's important for me to have some sense of normalcy in my life as we go through this so we will continue to work, hang out with friends, etc. Dont feel strange about calling us and inviting us out to dinner thinking we wouldnt want to do that. We do!
7) It's good to laugh. My dear friends Lori, Kat, Pam and Jeanine who have been through this with me before have been so good for that this past week. Some may find it odd, but we may make cancer jokes, it helps provide some leavity for an otherwise heavy conversation.
8) If you still feel like you dont know what to do, then join a "team". During my first battle, I believe it was my old boss and dear friend Ray Baird that explained the team approach. What's that old saying, it takes a village to raise a child, well I feel the same way with cancer, it takes a team to cure cancer. It's important to get organized and while we dont know what we will need yet, I can tell you last time I had people helping with food/nutrition, headwear, research and much more. Feel free to get involved. We will try and tell you what we need so if you do want to help you can. Otherwise I am hoping that we can use this blog and facebook to communicate and you can connect with others that are in our wonderful support circle.

That about sums it up for right now. I'd like to get to 10 tips for my article, so anybody have any other thoughts/suggestions??

I appreciate all the continued love, support and prayers. Please know that I am ready to kick this cancer's ass!!

I will continue to write here and keep everyone up to date. Writing this has been very cathartic for me. Now off to the grocery store to get ready for turkey day!

Love, Lynn